- THANK YOU! for your interest in this subject matter and in my story. INTENT: #support for the #significant_others of #transsexuals and #transgender, to #advocate the necessity of being your authentic self, and to share information with others. By this, I hope to support your own journey, or add to your understanding of the journey of someone you know. ABOUT ME: A 45 year old #heterosexual woman, divorced w/children, I met Jack and fell in love. Six years into our relationship, he confided his secret desire--Jack wanted to be a woman. Before his disclosure, I had no reason to suspect his interest. It was a shocking surprise! It was the decade of the 1990's. Little information was available to help ME understand 'Why' and 'What next". Not only was Jack in transition, but by virtue of the circumstance, so was I. Guided by my heart, I began a journey of my own. Stepping out of my comfort zone I challenged my attitudes and belief systems, as well as, my own sexual orientation to help me decide 'Do I stay, or do I go"?
Disclaimer Note to Information and Video Links
Informational links and videos for chosen topics are provided based on conversations and experiences I shared with J and the challenges that we faced. If the information provided helps just one person who views, it was worth my posting it.
Not everyone's need, or experience, will be the same as ours was.
By your View and your click on a particular post, I am able to know which topics are of most interest to the reader and will make sure I include responses to your interest within my book.
Thank you for your support!
Friday, September 5, 2014
Sunday, August 31, 2014
Lesbian or Gay? and your significant_other has come out to you as TS wanting to identify as either male or female?
I have written this blog from the perspective of a heterosexual female who discovers her male significant other wants to identify as female. However, I have spoken to many lesbian women who find their lesbian partner wishes to be a male, and gay men, who find the man they love, wants to be a female. When it comes to accepting your significant_other as TS, we all experience similar thoughts, feelings and questions.
Some Lesbian women have said they begin to question their own sexual identity when faced with a partner F>M. Some gay men expressed they wondered if they would still be attracted to their partner when he became she. The visual aspect for many men is a huge factor of attraction. These are only two of the myriad of thoughts that go through the mind of a significant other whether you are gay, lesbian or heterosexual when a partner makes this change. If you are cisgender Lesbian or gay man and are experiencing, or have experienced this situation, I would appreciate your comments. Let your experience be insight for someone else. #gay #lesbian #trans #question #gender #identity #sexualpreference #attraction #significant_other #cisgender #LGBTQ
Sunday, June 15, 2014
This "What Would You Do?" a staged situation produced by ABC News and John Quinones. A father unable to accept his teen transgender son who is in transition M>F confronts the son in a public place. Scenes set up to discover what on-lookers would do if they witnessed this type of event. Worth a watch! #support #father #son #transgender #acceptance #love #understanding #community #peers #friends #onlooker #community #LGBTTQ #unconditionallove #authenticself #whatwouldyoudo
Thursday, June 5, 2014
Parents and transgender children: I do not have much information on this site for transgender children and their parents, as it is not within my own experience. But, as an ally, and seeing this attached video produced by the Transgender Law Center, I believe it might be a wonderful positive support to the challenges transgender children and their parents face. I hope anyone viewing will see how important it is to be one's authentic self.
I also highly recommend the book on my resource list called "The Transgender Child, A Handbook for Families and Professionals" by Stephanie Brill and Rachel Pepper, to help answer your questions about your trans or gender variant child.
I often think about J in regard to "if J had been able to come out earlier in life as transgender, how different his life would be" and hope that all transchildren will be able to pursue their authentic self at the point of their discovery. I feel the flexibility of youth has to have its positive effect on the long-term physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual result for the TS. That said, it still isn't an easy journey for the child nor the parent.
If you think it is difficult for an adult to come out to those they love, imagine the fear a child may have! It can be particularly difficult for a parent, I understand that, you may feel you are losing a son or a daughter. Children, however, feel that if they come out to their parents, they will lose the parent. For an older child, this can be an unbelievable source of pain. All I can add is, try to be informed, educated, knowledgeable and supportive toward your child. Show a willingness to listen, understand, and encourage communication. He or she needs you now as a parent, more than they ever have, as they go through this transition.
If, as a parent you would like to do a blog post to address your concerns on this site, please do so. You can also e-mail me with questions at email@example.com - #teentrans #transchild #transparent #mom #dad #gendervariant_child #child #parent #love #authenticself #change #shine #children #transgender
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
The study below, published January 28, 2014, by Emily A. Reyes in the Los Angeles Times, speaks to a Transgender Study which looks at the "exceptionally high" suicide attempt rate among the transgender. It is 9x the US average. 41% of transgender individuals have attempted suicide. For more information about this study, please go to the link.
Coming through my own confusion of non-understanding, I came to realize that J was a "White Bird". He>She only wanting to have freedom for self. (Represented by analogy, through the music of Vanessa Mae) Please see sidebar.